The Illusion of Control


People who have been in relationships with narcissists and other individuals with whom there are difficult and painful dynamics, frequently live in an illusion that they can control the outcome of the relationship.

They claim responsibility where they shouldn’t.

They often take the blame when they shouldn’t, too.

The narcissist and many others have not a lick of difficulty with this, but when we apologize to make nice, we treat ourselves unfairly.

In addition, we reinforce the faulty cycle we are trying to stop.

Today, notice if that is what is happening. Be aware. Become a student of the activities of yourself.

Adapted from Surviving the Narcissist: 30 Days of Recovery by Meredith Resnick

Photo by Nathan Cowley

About the author 

Jillian Bietz

Jillian Bietz is a writer and editor who enjoys doing in-depth research and exploring a wide-range of topics including all facets of mental health and wellness. She is the editor for My Voice Can Speak.

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